For every woman who lives without freedom, the rest of us must face the guilt. Lillian Hellman


I have been writing this month about an old friend, someone who had her life, world and inner-being shattered by Domestic Violence. She is emerging each day a stronger, more confident lady, but yesterday’s fear and sorrow will never be forgotten. Barren River Area Safe Space, (BRASS), has been a huge part of her story of strength. This facility gave her courage when she decided to flee a home of fear. The advocates she worked with provided her with knowledge, options, and someone to lean on when days were dark. BRASS helped her find outside counsel from Kentucky Domestic Violence Association, (KDVA), when more legal strength was needed. Throughout her journey of “Freedom“, BRASS provided her with counseling services to help balance her emotional needs and try and work through the ghosts and monsters of yesterday.

My hope is that more awareness is given to Domestic Violence. I hope to aid in “breaking” the silence. We must continue to support local shelters and facilities like BRASS. Families and friends are wonderful support to victims, but without organizations like BRASS, too many women will not find their “Freedom”.


“Freedom”…..a coat of strength


Please continue the support and awareness of Domestic Violence.
For information on how you can help by making a purchase of Marsch Inspiration or a donation contact:

www.melissamarschwalblay.com
www.deborahgall.com
www.thegalleryat916.com
www.mesh_boutique.com
www.barrenriverareasafespace.com

“I know a lady who used to be full of smiles, spunk and energy. She had hopes, dreams, and ambitions. She was educated and family oriented, and her goals were within reach…..

I know a lady who was swept off her feet, became a wife, mother and her dreams changed. Though living in abundance, beautiful children, home, and lifestyle, when I looked in her eyes I saw hope suffocated by fear, with a color of royalty too often worn on her skin in mockery and all dreams vanishing….

I know a lady who lost her confidence, pride and balance. Clasping tightly to a shred of dignity left, she escaped the Hell enclosing her and continued into the Hell of public display. Struggling each day to have freedom and find peace, she kept her head up and kept walking…..

I know a lady who no longer fears closing her eyes at night. She left so much, but now has pride in what she has. Dreams and goals are on her daily list again. With smiles and new found energy she is driven to prove to herself she is worthy and capable. With echoes of harsh words still ringing in her ears, she is dedicated to finding her old self again…..

I know a lady who today, when I look in her eyes I see my old friend. Struggles are still there, and never does she forget the threats of yesterday, but she, with each new morning, sees herself becoming stronger, happier, confident, and most important, whole again....”
(more to come)

Last night I had the opportunity to attend the Barren River Area Safe Space Candlelight Vigil. The vigil was beautiful. The halo that surrounded us had a message of hope, but shadows of melancholy were still felt. Old friends, families, neighbors, public officials quietly spoke in the crowd and embraced the hope being brought. As the gentle tears of God lightly fell upon us, along with the chilly air HE blew, we all listened to the astounding statistics of how devastating Domestic Violence is to our community. Senator Mike Reynolds and Director Lee Alcott of BRASS captivated the audience with the urgency needed to help stop Domestic Violence.

While a few opened umbrellas, as if wiping away tears, most of us stood frozen, not feeling the wetness or cold. Silent emotion trickled down my spine as the countless names were read at “Speak My Name” in remembrance of those who did not escape.

As we lit the candles in respect, hope and honor, God once again reminded us all that still so much work is needed. I noticed as the sharing of the flame, candle to candle , for each one lit, another quietly went out. HE had sent a quiet message more strength is needed to break the silence.

Afterwards, a few hugs and smiles were sought, but quietly, we all began our departure into the darkness. While walking back to my car, I felt the wetness, the cold, damp air. An eery feeling engulfed me. Glancing back to the dispersing crowd I wondered how many were leaving a ray of hope to go to a home of fear.


Please continue the support and awareness of Domestic Violence.
For information on how you can help by making a purchase of Marsch Inspiration or a donation contact:

www.melissamarschwalblay.com
www.deborahgall.com
www.thegalleryat916.com
www.mesh_boutique.com
www.barrenriverareasafespace.com

“I know a lady who used to be full of smiles, spunk and energy. She had hopes, dreams, and ambitions. She was educated and family oriented, and her goals were within reach…..

I know a lady who was swept off her feet, became a wife, mother and her dreams changed. Though living in abundance, beautiful children, home, and lifestyle, when I looked in her eyes I saw hope suffocated by fear, with a color of royalty too often worn on her skin in mockery and all dreams vanishing….


I know a lady who lost her confidence, pride and balance. Clasping tightly to a shred of dignity left, she escaped the Hell enclosing her and continued into the Hell of public display. Struggling each day to have freedom and find peace, she kept her head up and kept walking…..


I know a lady who no longer fears closing her eyes at night. She left so much, but now has pride in what she has. Dreams and goals are on her daily list again. With smiles and new found energy she is driven to prove to herself she is worthy and capable. With echoes of harsh words still ringing in her ears, she is dedicated to finding her old self again….."

(continuing)




My goal this month is to bring awareness to a topic in society that most find undesirable to discuss. Through awareness, we find ways to help those among us to seek help in what seems hopeless situations. As a friend, parent, family member, neighbor, or even a by-stander, we cannot provide the best help for someone in a domestic abuse situation. Help, strength, and knowledge needs to come from our shelters, and organizations designed strictly to help those in domestic violent relationships. Employees and directors have been trained to assist and offer by far the best help.

Purple, or violet is the color associated with Domestic Violence. Loving color as I do, and all the meanings and significance of color, I find myself drawn to another hue to bless those who have escaped their Hell. Red, a powerful, dominant color seems a good fit. Strength is needed to continue the walk away process. Power is needed to continue the battle. Love is needed within the soul because more often than not, these victims have lost their heart, self-esteem and love for themselves.

My design for today is an incredibly soft, draping, silk camisole. A touch of softness to be worn at the heart….perhaps barely peeking out of a sweater, or jacket, but a bit of indulgence for a lady who has carried more than her share on her shoulders for too long.
I chose a shade of red that reflects a gemstone, the Ruby.

The ruby is considered to be the most powerful gem in the universe. This stone represents or symbolizes contentment, peace, protection, friendship and /or love, vitality and royalty.
The Ruby is filled with love. It is said that persons lacking in self-love should have and mediate on the Ruby. The color of rubies varies from vermilion to red. The most desired color is "pigeon's blood", which is pure red with a hint of blue. The best rubies and star rubies are bright red. Today’s design is so delicate, feminine, even a bit sexy….but powerful.


Rubies…..$70


Please continue the support and awareness of Domestic Violence. The story will continue throughout the month along with many new items.
For information on how you can help by making a purchase of Marsch Inspiration or a donation contact:

www.melissamarschwalblay.com
www.deborahgall.com
www.thegalleryat916.com
www.mesh_boutique.com
www.barrenriverareasafespace.com

“I know a lady who used to be full of smiles, spunk and energy. She had hopes, dreams, and ambitions. She was educated and family oriented, and her goals were within reach…..

I know a lady who was swept off her feet, became a wife, mother and her dreams changed. Though living in abundance, beautiful children, home, and lifestyle, when I looked in her eyes I saw hope suffocated by fear, with a color of royalty too often worn on her skin in mockery and all dreams vanishing….


I know a lady who lost her confidence, pride and balance. Clasping tightly to a shred of dignity left, she escaped the Hell enclosing her and continued into the Hell of public display. Struggling each day to have freedom and find peace, she kept her head up and kept walking….."
(to continue…)


One in four women has experienced domestic violence in her lifetime.
Between 600,000 and 6 million women are victims of domestic violence each year.
More shocking is that approximately one third of the men counseled for battering are professional men who are well respected in their jobs and in their communities. These have included doctors, physiologists, lawyers, ministers and business executives.
Through education, support and awareness we can help reduce these astounding statistics!

Getting out of a domestic violent relationship is the hardest part of the relationship. So many factors come into play. Where are you going to go or how are you going to get him out? Are children involved and what will happen to them? How do you make sure he can’t hurt you once you are apart? The questions and concerns are endless.


Leaving an abuser can be dangerous. Here are a few ideas on how you can leave or if you know someone who needs help, pass these ideas and support to her.

Call a women's shelter or domestic violence hot line for advice. Make the call at a safe time — when the abuser is not around — or from a friend's house or other safe location.

Start a private savings account if possible, or find a way to “put back” a little extra cash in a safe place.

Pack an emergency bag that includes items you'll need when you leave, such as extra clothes and keys. Hide it or leave the bag with a friend or neighbor. Keep important personal papers, money and prescription medications handy so that you can take them with you on short notice.

Have a plan! Know exactly where you'll go and how you'll get there, even if you have to leave in the middle of the night. I suggest having “key” words set to notify a friend or family member of your plans.
.
Above all, stay safe and be smart in your actions. A large number of domestic violence victims who break away from their abusive relationship are running for their lives. But for many of these women, there's often no end in sight - they still are unable to say, "I'm no longer a victim OR I'm now a survivor and I'll never be abused again." They are always at risk, always looking over their shoulders in fear, always trying to remain hidden from the men who pursue them relentlessly and won't let go.


Please continue the support and awareness of Domestic Violence. The story will continue throughout the month along with many new items.

“Love Her Madly”…………….$65 (size 6/8)

For information on how you can help by making a purchase of Marsch Inspiration or a donation contact:

www.melissamarschwalblay.com
www.deborahgall.com
www.thegalleryat916.com
www.mesh_boutique.com
www.barrenriverareasafespace.com

A story to be told….

“I know a lady who used to be full of smiles, spunk and energy. She had hopes, dreams, and ambitions. She was educated and family oriented, and her goals were within reach…..

I know a lady who was swept off her feet, became a wife, mother and her dreams changed. Though living in abundance, beautiful children, home, and lifestyle, when I looked in her eyes I saw hope suffocated by fear, with a color of royalty too often worn on her skin in mockery and all dreams vanishing…."
(more to come)

In February 2004, my mother was diagnosed with Inflammatory Breast Cancer. Her prognosis was bleak. The rare, but aggressive disease was rapidly invading her body, ripping away her hopes, dreams, and life. Through the following two years, I watched my mother struggle with treatments, surgery, pain, sickness, and that ever flicking hope that her predator, Cancer, would leave. Each morning, she approached her evil with a prayer that IT would leave in peace. She prayed daily that she could overpower this force and find freedom. I remember each doctor visit she would be so apprehensive and hopeful for the check up, but always holding her breath, never completely trusting her predator and his next move to conquer her. For every good check up, came the knowledge IT could still get her and after two years of this torture by an evil so callus, she realized she could not defeat Cancer. She went Home to find Peace June 2006.

Through out this battle, I often thought it reflected an inner torture an abused woman endures. We take for granted the constant torture of worry these women endure daily. They smile, go on, but inside know that at any given time HE may erupt. With the added “hush-hush” society likes to place on this topic, the abused woman may find herself even more alone to fight this battle. With more exposure, more awareness, more strength from society, women in this battle can find help to seek their freedom, their peace. True, like Cancer, even when HE is gone, she may still feel that constant “re-appearance” but she has stronger odds of survival. She has a support team holding her up, giving her strength.

October is National Awareness for Breast Cancer, and National Awareness for Domestic Violence. I want my readers, my friends, my family to help give every woman in our lives a stronger voice, a stronger shield. Stop the Predators!



“New Beginnings”…..$50

The story will continue throughout the month along with many new items.
For information on how you can help by making a purchase of Marsch Inspiration or a donation contact:

www.melissamarschwalblay.com
www.deborahgall.com
www.thegalleryat916.com
www.mesh_boutique.com
www.barrenriverareasafespace.com

A story to be told….

“I know a lady who used to be full of smiles, spunk and energy. She had hopes, dreams, and ambitions. She was educated and family oriented, and her goals were within reach…..
(to be continued)



October is Domestic Violence Awareness….I urge you to wear your purple ribbon!

Domestic violence should not happen to anybody. But it does - and when it does, there is help. October is Domestic Violence awareness month. I am writing today to help inform or to aid in the awareness of abused women. This is an area that is too often overlooked, dismissed, or too difficult to comprehend. Domestic Violence can happen in any home, lifestyle, or education level.

The abuse may be physical, emotional/psychological, sexual, financial/economical, or a mixing of all. The abuser and/or victim can also be someone who is college educated, makes a six figure income, lives in a more upscale neighborhood and considered upper middle class or even upper class. This particular segment is often found to be much harder to comprehend or find help from in society.

An upscale abused woman typically has not had prior exposure or experience with domestic abuse and is often shamed when it occurs in her life. Buying into the myth that it doesn't happen “to someone like her," she shuts down and keeps the secret of her abuse. Her shame leads to an isolation, which increases as her efforts to help her abusive partner fail. Ironically when the upscale abused woman does come forth, she is frequently disbelieved and is met with many obstacles in trying to get the help she needs and deserves. Too many times, she is met with the bias that she has so much advantage that she should be able to help herself. This form of violence is also met by the fact that the upscale batterer has the means and power to carry out any threats he makes toward his partner. Too many women have lost custody of their children due to the well-financed type of legal suits their wealthy partners were able to win.

I am hoping all my readers, friends, family will help make a difference this month. I am dedicating 50% of my sales this month, to a local shelter, Barren River Area Safe Space. Facilities such as these are needed to give shelter, legal advice, and information to any abused woman. With the aid of the advocates they provide, many women find the strength to continue the battle. This is a system that focuses on the victim and her family. Confidentiality and safety is their top priority. Too many women would not make it through the battle if it were not for the support, encouragement and belief these workers give.

I bring back an encore presentation of “Violets” for my debut of this month. Violets was designed with my Grandmother in mind, a lady of peace, harmony and someone who knew how rough life could be. She lived in day and time where no spoke openly of Domestic Violence. We now live in a society filled with knowledge, support and strength. We can change old ways, habits and help systems work better! Purple ribbons will be passed along this month, a color of royalty, wisdom, dignity, and independence. Too many women have lost their dignity, feel no independence and no power. We must unite and give back this strength to those in need.

Violets…55” x 76” $90

The story will continue throughout the month along with many new items.
For information on how you can help by making a purchase of Marsch Inspiration contact:

www.melissamarschwalblay.com
www.deborahgall.com
www.thegalleryat916.com
www.mesh_boutique.com

For making donations please contact Barren River Area Safe Space, 270-781-9334 or lalcott@barrenriverareasafespace.com